How do you say good-bye to someone you love? To one of your favorites? To that person who taught you to tie your shoes, bought you your first bike, and took you to the library to give you the love of books?
I got the word last week that my Grandma wasn't doing well. I hadn't been able to get a hold of her so I had a feeling her cancer hadn't been treated and she wasn't doing well.
I was right. It's just a matter of time now.
A week ago I went to see her. It was hard.
With sunken cheekbones she needed help lifting a teacup to her lips.
I held her hand and stroked her hair and we talked.
I asked her if she was excited to meet Jesus. She reminded me this world is not her home. She talked of the love of Jesus that would make Him die for us to have a life after this.
I came home and wept. I still weep. I'll always weep in this world for her.
But my tears are not without hope or promise. My tears are because I will miss her and the Southern way she would say "Fahr" for fire.
But I know I will see her again. She'll read me the three little pigs like I remember and we can make fun of men like we did together. She'll tell me I'm strong and she's strong and God's strong. Solidarity sister.
That night my Grandma told me to have a good life with Nicholas. And she loves me. And that Jesus loves her. I think those three things surmise my entire relationship with my grandma.
Friday evening my Grandma Wannie got to run into the arms of Jesus. How amazing it must have been for her. I miss her like crazy but I am so excited to know that she is without pain and is so happy in heaven.
Tomorrow is the funeral but here's what I've come to know: I'm not saying goodbye to Grandma but so-long. We know we'll see one another in heaven and there will be no end. And there's nothing sweeter than that.